Wednesday, June 24, 2015

I Used To Be The Perfect Parent...

My days quite often start with the first few hours in pyjamas, there is usually someone moaning for something, while the house lays pretty much in a 'post burglary' state 99% of the time. The cats meow constantly for food (their plates are full) and our dog that think's she is a cat walks slowly in front of my feet - trying to kill me? My visions of our perfect Topsy & Tim style home days haven't quite emerged yet, but I'm working on it! We are usually late, we can never find A's shoes and I have had to tell him more than once today to remove his boy bits from objects in the house, just your average day in our household.

We've all done it, judge people we don't know for their parenting skills and how they cope with their children - or don't cope I should say. I still do it to an extent but nowhere near as much as I used to. It's bloody tough this parenting lark at times and you never ever know the whole story.



There's that kid that has the tantrum in the supermarket - and you're thinking 'jeez what a brat, why don't they parent that kid better?'. Then BOOM. Suddenly you're a parent yourself and it's your three year old having a tantrum because oranges aren't blue or whatever ludicrous thing has got their back up that day. Suddenly you're the one looking like the hopeless parent, while your kid does their best (and loudest) Maria Carey notes. You see people looking and muttering and you know exactly what they are saying, you've said it yourself after all.



















I always knew what I would do when I had my baby, where he would sleep and when, how I would feed and for how long. Baby number one soon came along and wow they do not go according to plan - do they?! My baby hated his bed, he seemed to hate life unless he was being held, and only by me! I didn't mind but it meant I lived of crisps and never got anything done. Those mums you see with a bit of extra weight, it's not always laziness and the house isn't just a tip because they sit around doing nothing all day, it's hard work keeping a baby entertained and it's hard work making it through the day at all some times. Baby A fed for approximately two years longer than I had planned and all my views of breastfeeding, weaning, anything baby related, went flying out the window when he rode up with colic, reflux and uber clingyness. I have to say that now with my second baby, I kind of miss that clingyness, she is much more independent, with no colic or reflux and will be held by anyone, including her brother - nuts. 

In my head I was the best of all the parents, I was the perfect mother. I had it all worked out and then I actually had kids. Then I became what I know now is a normal parent. A good one, but one that comes with trials, errors and tears. Good tears, bad tears and buckets of love and laughter to overpower anything life throws at us. I know I will be judged at times, by nobody more than myself. The last thing my son said to me before bed tonight was that - "Mr & Mrs Pooh are in the toilet but their children are stuck inside my (his) bottom, they will have to wait until tomorrow, I hope they aren't sad". You couldn't have a sweeter bed time story than that, could you? I'm pretty sure I made the perfect child.

I know I'm far from perfect, but I think everyone is really in the same boat. If you haven't had children yet, all I can say is to never judge until you have been in that position yourself. These little people are amazing, lovely, fun - but also exhausting and testing at times. They are full of emotion but with an amazing positivity that we need to keep going. I love the chaos of our life really and I can't imagine a night where we actually sleep well, where is the fun in that?



Thanks for reading,

Wafflemama





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