When it comes to the pressure of running a 'perfect' home, being a 'perfect' parent and living the 'perfect' life, I must admit I don't really feel the pressure, but wow I know a lot of people that do. I feel bad for them, if only they could see what the rest of the world see. I have my moments, especially with parenting where I feel constant guilt that I may not be doing things right. I know life's not perfect, I'm not, and nothing ever will be, and that is OK. It's taken a while to get here, and a few life altering events, but it's a much nicer place to be. I think I've just learnt to appreciate the little things and realise how lucky I am.
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| A smile says all you need to know. |
Our house is clean but messy a lot (ok most) of the time. We are rarely visitor ready and I just think life is far too short for constant cleaning and ironing. As long as nobody is likely to catch anything, I'm happy. Apart from the need/want to move (geographically) at some point, I can't really say I want for much. I'm happy enough to get a nice long hair wash and scrub at home once a week. Chuck a bacon sandwich in the mix and I'm on cloud nine.
Most the mums I know worry far too much, I do at times too and I can honestly say not one of them needs to and I couldn't really say a bad thing about any of them. When it comes to the things they are unhappy about, from the outside, to me, it looks pretty good. In terms of parenting, the ones who seem to worry (in my eyes) tend to be doing a better job than most, so if that's you? Chill out, you're amazing.
As the cliches go - 'there's no such thing as perfect' and 'the grass is always greener'. It's true, and whatever you think to your current situation or your parenting skills, you can bet that someone somewhere thinks you are amazing and may even be jealous that you are living the perfect life.
It's OK to admit defeat sometimes, to struggle with washing, keeping things tidy or trying to make a tired toddler be well behaved on a boring shopping trip. We all have our moments, minutes, days or weeks where we think we can't cope or that maybe just maybe we are terrible mothers, fathers wives or husbands. We are all equal and on the same journey, so never put yourself down.
Never strive for a level of perfection that doesn't exist. Enjoy what you have and don't ever try and be like anyone else. There is no set level for 'perfect' and having a happy home is far more important than that home being spotless or having room for a donkey. I'm sure the people that seem 'perfect' also have lots of bad points that we wouldn't be so desperate for, you just don't know about them yet.
So what is all this waffling about? Well, I want some of you mamas out there (and maybe some of the man folk too) to relax, don't feel pressured to achieve a certain thing, or be a certain way. There is no set bar for where we should be.
Aim high, dream of different things, work to achieve them, but never feel pressured. Somewhere out there is somebody who would kill for what you have, the home, car, kids, whatever it may be. Whatever you feel you need to reach your 'perfect', work hard for it, be better (if you think you need to be), make cut backs or sacrifices if you need to, but love life along the way. Ease up on the pressure and be kinder to yourself, you are perfect to somebody.
Most the mums I know worry far too much, I do at times too and I can honestly say not one of them needs to and I couldn't really say a bad thing about any of them. When it comes to the things they are unhappy about, from the outside, to me, it looks pretty good. In terms of parenting, the ones who seem to worry (in my eyes) tend to be doing a better job than most, so if that's you? Chill out, you're amazing.
As the cliches go - 'there's no such thing as perfect' and 'the grass is always greener'. It's true, and whatever you think to your current situation or your parenting skills, you can bet that someone somewhere thinks you are amazing and may even be jealous that you are living the perfect life.
It's OK to admit defeat sometimes, to struggle with washing, keeping things tidy or trying to make a tired toddler be well behaved on a boring shopping trip. We all have our moments, minutes, days or weeks where we think we can't cope or that maybe just maybe we are terrible mothers, fathers wives or husbands. We are all equal and on the same journey, so never put yourself down.
Never strive for a level of perfection that doesn't exist. Enjoy what you have and don't ever try and be like anyone else. There is no set level for 'perfect' and having a happy home is far more important than that home being spotless or having room for a donkey. I'm sure the people that seem 'perfect' also have lots of bad points that we wouldn't be so desperate for, you just don't know about them yet.
So what is all this waffling about? Well, I want some of you mamas out there (and maybe some of the man folk too) to relax, don't feel pressured to achieve a certain thing, or be a certain way. There is no set bar for where we should be.
Aim high, dream of different things, work to achieve them, but never feel pressured. Somewhere out there is somebody who would kill for what you have, the home, car, kids, whatever it may be. Whatever you feel you need to reach your 'perfect', work hard for it, be better (if you think you need to be), make cut backs or sacrifices if you need to, but love life along the way. Ease up on the pressure and be kinder to yourself, you are perfect to somebody.
Thanks for reading.
Wafflemama
