October 22, 2016

The Open Pen >> 'Mum Friends'

Anonymous Bloggers

Another Open Pen post from a lovely anonymous blogger. This is one I am betting a lot of mums will relate to, I know I can. See what you think and if you have any words or tips for the writer, please leave them in the comments below and I'll make sure she gets to see them.

"Who needs friends? Me. Clearly.
At this particular point in my life, I am feeling pretty damn lonely. My closest friend recently moved really far away, another one of my closest friend just decided to sort of ditch me after that. I feel like I need some mummy friends, but I just don't know anyone around here. I haven't really been in this town that long, and I still don't really know anyone. It's not like I've never had friends, I had quite a few friends during school & college days, and we all sort of just..drifted apart. I had children, they went travelling. We didn't really have anything in common any more. Whenever I try to meet up with 'friends' or get to know people again, it feels like I have to do everything, I don't get anything in return. I don't feel like I'm even acknowledged some days and honestly, it feels like crap. Of course, I've got my other half, who is my best friend. But sometimes you just need another mum, or another woman to talk to. It's different than talking to your partner.

I need some friends to actually go out with, some mummy friends to go on play dates with. I feel like such a loser at times, when people are always posting photos of amazing places & people they were with and I'm like "Yeah dude, I'm lying in bed watching Eastenders, feeling sorry for myself".

It's not like I don't put the effort in to make friends, or reconnect with old friends either, I do, all the time. I go out to mummy groups, I start up conversations. I try to be nice & invite people places, but it just doesn't work. 

So aside for all this feeling sorry for myself, my question is..
Am I doomed to be friend less forever more?
How do you..as an adult..make friends?! 
Girl friends, Mummy friends."

If you have a post you'd like to get off your chest anonymously, please do drop me an email.


  1. I'm about to be in a similar situation as I'm moving and I don't drive. I feel like I cant expect my friends to visit me all the time but if we're going to see each other they'll have to, or we'll drift apart. I'm so worried about making friends in a new town. I'm going to try my hardest to make friends when my son moves to his new school but I know it will be difficult as most mums would have made friends already. I found going to Adult events was good for making friends after I left school, I know it's hard when you have kids but could be worth looking into? At least you'll know you have something in common. Good luck xx

    1. Thanks for your comments Keri. Much appreciated by the blogger that sent this over and I really wish you luck with your move too! I think we worry more about the kids but actually it's way harder for us grown ups to make new pals xx

  2. No ....
    You'll never be alone
    Just have little soirees and ring friends -make new acquaintances at the school gates-before you know it theyll be queing up