Tuesday, June 28

Girls >> It's All About Confidence!

This is one of those 'practise what you preach' scenarios, but it just really has to be said. The confidence and self esteem of women generally is low - like seriously LOW! Lower than that and then some.

Do I think we can blame the media? No. Do we need to blame those blatantly airbrushed celebs or oh so perfect models in their perfect dinky bikinis with their perfect non-spam like foreheads, with not an ounce of bitterness? No. Do we need to blame other women for putting us down or making us feel bad? No.

We need to blame ourselves. We are our own worst enemies and it has to stop.

As a nation (or even species), we are by large terribly humble, generally modest and do not take compliments well, which is not just completely silly, but also really bloody irritating don't you think? You tell someone they look really nice today and they come back with something like 'oh god no I look rough', despite an hours prep in the bathroom and a little selfie on the way out the door. We've all done it, and said it and I just don't know why.

Take the compliments, put them in your thank bank and walk tall - nothing is more attractive than confidence. I'm not talking that cocky confidence that makes others feel like crap, but that 'this is me, I am what I am, like it or lump it' confidence that so many of us lack. Life is far too short to dwell on things we can't change.

I am definitely one for not taking complements well but I am trying to change it. I have friends that call themselves 'hideous', 'fat' - one even referred to herself as being 'as attractive as Sasquatch's' dick'. I've not seen it myself, but I guess it's not pretty and I'm pretty sure she wasn't being as kind as she should be to herself. 

All my friends are beautiful and I would never give compliments that weren't true. I just wish that us women could see what other people see sometimes and be a little more happy in our own skin. It's hard at times, I know it is but this whole hating ourselves thing has got old, really really bloody old.

I am coming to learn to follow this way of thinking now, I mean I'm not going to have a new face any time soon, my hair isn't suddenly going to stop turning to a Mick Hucknall like bush with the slightest sniff of humidity and these wobbly bits aren't going anywhere fast. I'm blessed with a family, I have a roof over my head (even if it is currently leaking) and I am pretty healthy and that is what truly matters.

Confidence is a funny old thing and I think as you get a little older you realise that it's far easier and more fun to just be happy, work with what you've got and enjoy life instead of picking holes in yourself and constantly putting yourself down.

So ladies, my friends that are at a loss with their looks, have had their confidence shattered by stupid people or don't see the picture perfect model looking back from the mirror - here is my message to you.

You are bloody amazing, you are beautiful, you are clever, funny and have a life so many can only dream of. That bum you hate, someone would love that over their own. That hair you moan about, someone dreams of that curl or deathly straightness. Those boobs that give you black eyes when you run are someones idea of perfect and you are you. There is no changing that.

Be confident, don't ever compare yourself to others, be yourself, smile and for god sake, please please please take a compliment. Go now, yes right now and give yourself a good talking to. I promise that shaking off that hate for yourself will be the best thing you ever do.

#SelfieConfident - use this hashtag to show you are happy in your skin!

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  1. You are so right. I don't have much confidence at all and I think it suffered even more when I took maternity leave. It's coming back slowly but we shouldn't put ourselves down at all. We are fabulous and we should shout it from the rooftops! #FriYAYlinky

  2. I love this post, so inspirational.
    It's definetly a message others need to hear! Including myself.
    I have next to no confidence :/ xx


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