Friday, June 23, 2017

Parents, We Need To Talk ...

Being a Mum (or parent) is so stressful at times and sometimes from the outside looking in, it can seem like everyone is doing everything better than you and some certainly like to make it look that way.

If I've learnt one thing from being a mum though, it's that none of us are doing it perfectly, we are all learning, we are all making mistakes and for every good day that goes smoothly, another will come along to bite you in the arse at some point that brings you to tears. There is no right or wrong, we are all different.

It's OK sometimes to lose your shizzle a little, it's OK to cry, it's OK to feel like you want to run away or crave bedtime for a little rest and quiet. We all have days where we feel we can't do this or wonder why we ever thought we were capable of such a massive role in the first place. Talking about it helps.

On the bad days it's really hard to focus on the positives and most of all to stay positive and be bright and breezy with your kids and do you know what? It really is OK to not be OK and to show it. Explain to your children why you're feeling sad/angry/tired/stressed and in turn they will learn to talk about all those feelings too. Communication is such a huge thing and the earlier they learn to not bottle things up, the better.

Nobody ever said any of this was going to be easy, nor did they tell us that at times you'd feel so stressed your heart would hurt or that you'd feel so passionately in love with your little humans that you get driven to the brink of insanity and worry all the time for their safety and happiness.

I just wanted to say that if you have ever felt like a bad parent or that maybe you aren't cut out for this, that we all feel like that at times, we are all 'winging' it, doing our best and winning at the very thing we were put here to do. Talk to a friend, your kids, to family, to a random group on Facebook or even to me, just don't ever feel you're alone with it.

Lose your shizzle, go bananas, cry in a corner, drink some wine if that's your thing and just do what ever the hell makes you happy. As long as you're happy, your kids will be too and it's always a good thing to let your emotions out, whether that's in front of or away from your kids. Do you know what happens if you bottle things up for too long? At some point the bottle gets too full, the pressure gets too much, it cracks and it explodes into a hundred broken pieces. Don't let that be you too, let it out as you go, talk about things and remember you are doing an amazing job, even when it doesn't feel like it. If you need a little extra help with partners or family, there's always relationship counselling to give you that extra boost.