Thursday, August 25, 2016

School Time >> It's Not Getting Any Easier!

Why am I such a sap?

I know I am being totally ridiculous thinking this, let alone saying it and writing it here, but Alf starting school is just not getting any easier for me. I miss him already even though I spend most my days with him sat on my lap - just as he has for the last nearly 5 years.

Part of me hoped summer would be hard, that he would be bored, moan at me for not having enough to do, drive me crazy winding up his sister or eating me out of house and home.

Actually though, he's been a dream (mostly), Soph's been a dream (mostly) and we have had the best summer so far with just over a week to go.

I am really  really struggling with the idea that he will be gone all day Monday to Friday and as much as I'm excited for his next chapter, I can't help but selfishly feel a bit like my baby is being taken away. Alf is my best friend and I've been so lucky to spend nearly 5 years at home with him and I am going to miss him so much. (I work when he slept so we still have our days).

As the weeks go by and we have done the uniform shop, bagged him some little leather school shoes and ordered his school meals, September is closing in on me big time and I can't help but beat myself up about all the times we have wasted days or I've told him off for things that in hindsight probably didn't matter. 

This is all killing me a little bit and I know how dramatic and stupid that sounds and I'm sure it will be fine.

I'm handing over one of my most treasured things in the whole world and I just won't be there to look after him and that makes me sad. Really sad.

I know school will be fun, I know everyone will love him as he's so kind and funny and I even know he has well outgrown his old playgroups, a lot of his toys and adventures, but I will just miss him, I will miss us the way we have been.

Fingers crossed for an easy start and I hope more than anything that he loves it and makes lots of lovely friends that will help look after him.

Any tips on making that first start easier?