Wednesday, June 24

I Used To Be The Perfect Parent...

My days quite often start with the first few hours in pyjamas, there is usually someone moaning for something, while the house lays pretty much in a 'post burglary' state 99% of the time. The cats meow constantly for food (their plates are full) and our dog that think's she is a cat walks slowly in front of my feet - trying to kill me? My visions of our perfect Topsy & Tim style home days haven't quite emerged yet, but I'm working on it! We are usually late, we can never find A's shoes and I have had to tell him more than once today to remove his boy bits from objects in the house, just your average day in our household.

We've all done it, judge people we don't know for their parenting skills and how they cope with their children - or don't cope I should say. I still do it to an extent but nowhere near as much as I used to. It's bloody tough this parenting lark at times and you never ever know the whole story.



There's that kid that has the tantrum in the supermarket - and you're thinking 'jeez what a brat, why don't they parent that kid better?'. Then BOOM. Suddenly you're a parent yourself and it's your three year old having a tantrum because oranges aren't blue or whatever ludicrous thing has got their back up that day. Suddenly you're the one looking like the hopeless parent, while your kid does their best (and loudest) Maria Carey notes. You see people looking and muttering and you know exactly what they are saying, you've said it yourself after all.



















I always knew what I would do when I had my baby, where he would sleep and when, how I would feed and for how long. Baby number one soon came along and wow they do not go according to plan - do they?! My baby hated his bed, he seemed to hate life unless he was being held, and only by me! I didn't mind but it meant I lived of crisps and never got anything done. Those mums you see with a bit of extra weight, it's not always laziness and the house isn't just a tip because they sit around doing nothing all day, it's hard work keeping a baby entertained and it's hard work making it through the day at all some times. Baby A fed for approximately two years longer than I had planned and all my views of breastfeeding, weaning, anything baby related, went flying out the window when he rode up with colic, reflux and uber clingyness. I have to say that now with my second baby, I kind of miss that clingyness, she is much more independent, with no colic or reflux and will be held by anyone, including her brother - nuts. 

In my head I was the best of all the parents, I was the perfect mother. I had it all worked out and then I actually had kids. Then I became what I know now is a normal parent. A good one, but one that comes with trials, errors and tears. Good tears, bad tears and buckets of love and laughter to overpower anything life throws at us. I know I will be judged at times, by nobody more than myself. The last thing my son said to me before bed tonight was that - "Mr & Mrs Pooh are in the toilet but their children are stuck inside my (his) bottom, they will have to wait until tomorrow, I hope they aren't sad". You couldn't have a sweeter bed time story than that, could you? I'm pretty sure I made the perfect child.

I know I'm far from perfect, but I think everyone is really in the same boat. If you haven't had children yet, all I can say is to never judge until you have been in that position yourself. These little people are amazing, lovely, fun - but also exhausting and testing at times. They are full of emotion but with an amazing positivity that we need to keep going. I love the chaos of our life really and I can't imagine a night where we actually sleep well, where is the fun in that?



Thanks for reading,

Wafflemama





Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

Parenting Linky

17 comments:

  1. So true! I read and read and read till I was blue in the face before boy #1 was born, thought I had it licked. And boy did he throw me a curve ball! I never read another thing for the other 4!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha same here! Wow after 5 you can write the book :) thank you for reading! X

      Delete
  2. So true, so true. I've had it all thrown at me this morning and I swear I'd be horrified if I was watching in from outside. Currently my daughter is testing my limits by screaming rather than talking. She's nearly 4. Is it time for wine yet?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol, blackcurrant squash in a wine glass! It'll have to do :) my sons 4 in October and is really on form today too! He just had a cry because of our fish that 'moved out' a year ago, think he's tired. Thank you for reading and commenting! Xx

      Delete
  3. I love how we all think others are doing so much better at this parenting lark - then we talk honestly and it turns out that we're all in the same boat; impressed that we got through the day without seriously harm.

    As a mum of 4 boys, I would like to campaign for wine on prescription :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha! That sounds like a great campaign, I'm all over it :) four boys - wow! You must have lots of fun, and washing! Thanks so much for reading/commenting xx

      Delete
  4. Perfect parents are a myth anyway :) show me a tidy house and I'll show you a house without kids lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly :) though I wouldn't complain if it was tidy, as long as we still had fun! Not happening any time soon though! Thanks for reading/commenting :)

      Delete
  5. Haha I can totally relate to this. You do sound like the perfect mama and I bet your kids think so too. FYI, I was in my PJ's until 1pm yesterday ;) K x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you :) :) PJ days are the best! xx

      Delete
  6. I just wrote a post about guilt and it all rings true there was never a manual to say whats right or wrong - we never have a tidy house! also every Saturday I don't rush round and usually we all stay in pjs!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sound perfect to me :) the guilt is crazy when you have kids isn't it! I'll have to come have a look. We never had a tidy house pre babies so there really was no hope! xx

      Delete
  7. Never a truer word haha. I remember being pregnant in the supermarket and hearing a child having a tantrum and my hubby saying 'ours won't be like that will they'.....so naive. Then of course after the first I thought I had a rule book! Until the second one came along and ate it! Literally!!!! Haha!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol thank you! We were the same with any kid we saw, to be fair ours isnt as bad as most, luckily!! If i have a third we will be perfect by then lol xx

      Delete
    2. I'm having no more but if we DID, they would also be perfect! ;-) Haha. That's my story and I'm sticking to it

      Delete
  8. When I was pregnant I thought I would be the perfect parent, living in a perfect house and every day would be like the movies. Wow was I wrong. Out he popped with no instruction booklet and we just had to wing it as best we could. He is now a teenager so I'm not looking forward to teenage times. Now the other is a toddler our house usually consists of toys everywhere, breakfast dishes in the sink at lunchtime, crayon marks on our walls but you know what I love it. Pj days are the best.
    Thanks for linking up to #ToddlersAndteens

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! Oh god don't get me started on the teenage years, - terrified of that! Thank you for reading and hosting the linky :) x

      Delete

Please complete this form or contact me direct at wafflemamauk@gmail.com